Jury Duty

Yesterday, I was called upon to fulfill my civil obligation to serve on a jury. Having never served before, I wasn't quite sure what to expect, but what I did expect was to NOT get selected. I was actually assured by everyone I know that I would not be picked because I am "too opinionated". I feel that the word "opinionated" has a negative connotation to it. I prefer "principled". I am one of those people who believes that most of life is black & white, with very little gray. There is usually a very distinct line between right & wrong. I believe the Bible and the Ten Commandments, etc . . . I had always previously felt that having such rigid standards made me unsympathetic or intolerant, but my experience on jury duty yesterday, in combination with some things happening in other areas of my life, helped me to see that maybe, it's just the opposite. I'll explain.

Despite being so "opinionated", I was selected to serve on this specific jury. The defendant was charged with a DWI, to which he pled "not guilty". There was much evidence and testimony from various witnesses, lots of annoying arguments from the lawyers on both sides, and various other procedural things that I considered a huge waste of time. We were told the law in regards to a DWI, and our job was to determine whether or not this man was guilty. We were given very clear evidence, and our decision was easy. What I found interesting was the fact that he was pleading "not guilty". His lawyer's line of defense was to make the line of the law seem very fuzzy, as if it were subjective, based on our various opinions and how he was able to influence them with his questioning and opening & closing statements.

What I learned was this: When there is a distinct and definite line between right and wrong, you become more self-aware, and therefore more sympathetic to others' faults because you see more clearly all the faults of your own. For example, a person who has this hazy view of a moral right & wrong is able to spend most of their lives in that gray area. In the gray area, you are not convinced that you are wrong, and you are more easily able to convince yourself that you just might be right. This, then, leads to a habitual feeling of always being in the right, which inclines one to be less tolerant of others' faults and failures. It also leads to a total lack of the ability to accept responsibility or blame. As I've gotten older and a little wiser, I've learned that the more fiercely I cling to this principle, the more cognizant I am of my many many shortcomings and become more and more sympathetic to those around me.

More sympathetic and tolerant of mistakes and bad decisions. Not necessarily more tolerant of weakness. You can't melt all this ice water (in my veins) in a day. I'm working on it . . .